On Happines and Bicycles

by ⋅ Leave a Comment ⋅ Aside

My much loved Indi hybrid bike, aka George, combines 21-speed comfort with good suspension, tyres like a mountain bike and sit-up-straight handlebars. All of that has made for enormous fun as we’ve trundled around Perth together over the years.

George has been my window of independence for many years, even when riding a bike wasn’t possible. Knowing she was there – waiting for me whenever I needed her – made me feel safe. Silly, perhaps, but the idea of getting rid of my bike made me feel lost and less independent.

On that basis, I’ve been shilly-shalling about rehoming her for months. This, despite the fact that riding her had become increasingly difficult and she had become more part of the background garage decor than something in regular – or even intermittent – use.

After my usual New Year internal review, I created a vision board to help me to focus. Following on from this, and as a step towards being more active, I went and acquired an electric-assist bike. It had been under consideration for some time, but I’d stalled out as it seemed like taking the easy way out. Instead, it’s allowed me to actually get back to riding regularly – something that’s always been a happy-making thing.

In short, my new magical electric velocipede – let’s call her Little Bird, is working out just fine. Even if I only use the electric assist when I absolutely have to, having it makes all the difference – making the thought of the hills far less daunting and the fun of the ride all it should be.

Cycling home in the cool of the morning today, I felt relaxed and happy. Not special-reason-happy, not epiphany-standout-moment-happy… just regular smiley-type-out-on-my-bike-happy. And it was suddenly clear that it was well past time for George to stop lurking in a corner of the garage, neglected and gathering dusk. It was time  me to say goodbye and for her to  head off on new adventures to visit new places with a new human.

So this afternoon I advertised George as a free-to-a-friend bike – and she was snapped up in no time at all. As it turns out, sometimes, letting go of something can be surprisingly unstressful. Instead of feeling lost  or sad as I helped to load her into the back of her new human’s car later on, I felt pleased – both that she’ll be able to ‘keep on trucking’ and that the lass who’s taken her home was so delighted to have a bike again. 

Maybe one day she’ll hand a bike on to someone else who needs one – who knows. Meantime, LittleBird and I will be out and about at every opportunity!

Sharing a smile

by ⋅ 1 Comment ⋅ Aside

Last week I was presented with the choice of 20+ fridge magnets and an invitation to choose as many as I’d like. The magnets were created by a friend from original photographs that he took, in and around Perth. He combined the images with words to create positive messages for himself – and then decided to share them.

The art work is terrific and part of me wanted to grab all 20 and whack them up all over my fridge. But instead I showed some restraint and spent a bit of time sorting through to see if any of them really leapt out at me and said ‘take me home’.

What I discovered is that, although they’re all lovely, only two of them really resonated with me on that particular day. One because it’s who I am and the other because I need the reminder. 

I must have looked at those magnets dozens of times since I put them up. Whenever I open and close the fridge, there they are. They remind me to take a mental step back from rushing around and be present in the moment  – and they’ve made me smile. Every time.

So thanks, friend, for sharing your thoughts and smiles. They’re greatly appreciated. Smiles are huge and happy and lovely and can totally make someone’s day – especially if they’re shared.

So here are my smiles, dear tea leaf readers. I hope they work for you too – and that you share them around 🙂

A little jar of happies

by ⋅ 5 Comments ⋅ Aside

This time last year I committed to two things. To my surprise, both turned out to be far more sustainable options than my usual last minute random NYE resolutions.

The first of these commitments was to choose the word active to be my compass for 2017, to help me to focus on completing projects, starting new ones, trying new things and making the most of opportunities.

The second was to start a happiness jar. I hoped this would encourage me to be more present in my life and to pay attention even when things got busy or difficult.

I aimed to think of one thing each week that had made me smile, write it down on a post-it note and then pop it in the jar. All year.

 When I opened my jar of happies on New Years Eve I found 54 post-its – clearly a longer than average year!

Friends and I took turns to read them aloud as midnight approached. Each note reminded us of what sorts of things make me smile, many of them to do with my garden, the dogs and the people I love. They brought the year back into focus, although it was rather reminiscent of listening to a story I know, but have half forgotten. So many  ‘ah yes’ moments, laughter and even a little sadness.

2017 was certainly a busy, sometimes overly active year and, whilst blogging (and writing in general) took a bit of a hit as a result, many things were achieved personally, professionally and creatively.

Selecting a word for the year and gradually filling my little jar of happiness made me feel positive about the year as it unfolded, and I’ll be taking both ideas forward into the years ahead.

My jar has been emptied and awaits its first post-it for the year.

For a multitude of reasons, I’ll be focusing on resilience as my word for 2018.

I could have chosen fortitude or exercise or creativity or fun – they all popped into my head as possibilities last night. But resilience carries with it the notion of strength that could provide me with the framework for everything else this year. It encapsulates a level of both mental and physical robustness, the ability to bounce back, to cope with change, plan for the future and enjoy the present.

And that’s what I need this year: more bounce, more plans, and a whole lot of enjoyment!

How about you?

Whatever you choose, I wish you the very best of years.

A helping hand

by ⋅ Leave a Comment ⋅ Aside

With Christmas on the horizon I’m starting to feel I ought to get organised, plan menus, shop for gifts – do all the things that I do every year to ensure my family has a good time over the festive period.

We’ll start the season with a trip to Mandurah to admire the Xmas lights in early December and follow that up with our (now) traditional eggnog night a week or so later. Some of us will make gifts to share, we’ll shop for get our Secret Santa gifts and – with luck – move smoothly through the rest of the Xmas festivities. It’s a happy, sociable time for all of us.

Sadly, Christmas isn’t a happy time for everyone. For many it’s stressful, bringing feelings of desperation and sadness rather than joy as people struggle to provide for their families over the holiday season.

According to the 2017 Foodbank Hunger Report, more and more Australians have to choose between feeding their families and paying their bills – and this is never more apparent than over the Christmas period.

So what can we do? We help – in any way we can.

In December 2015 Daughter Dearest and I took part in a reverse advent activity, collecting food items over several weeks and then delivering the hampers to Foodbank just before Xmas that year. Shopping for other people, thinking about what they might need or want was a real feel-good experience and we wanted to do it more regularly.

So, in 2016 we launched a quarterly food drive. We set up a Facebook group, called it Food Fight and invited a few people to join in. It started out small, with just a few of us contributing whatever non-perishables we could every three months.

In 2016 we collected and delivered over 200kg of food to Foodbank for them to distribute to those in need. This year we overtook that target in September, when we reached the 236kg mark. A great result.

The challenge is to see if we can crack 300kg by mid-December 2017. Can we do it? Can we, between us, contribute at least 70kg of food within the next month?

I believe so – and hope you do too. If we work together we can and will make a difference to some of Perth’s least advantaged people this Christmas.

How?

  • Get a box
  • Add a couple of extra items to your shopping trolley each time you shop over the next few weeks.
  • Choose some of items suggested by Foodbank (below) – but please remember, NO GLASS
  • Deliver your box of goodies to Menagerie10 (our place) by Thursday 14 December or contact Nik to arrange for a pick up run on Sunday 10 December.

Let’s work together to make Christmas a little brighter for some Perth families this year.

Birthday pro-tips

by ⋅ Leave a Comment ⋅ Aside

The first quarter of our year always seems to be crammed with more birthdays than any other time.

So far we’ve celebrated:
– an excited lego & star wars crazy five-year old grand-nephew
– two of my siblings, both happy enough to just let the day pass without much fuss
– an evening of mango-madness to celebrate friend’s 35th birthday
– my BFF’s special day (although having the ‘flu did put a bit of a damper on things for her)

Still to come we have:
– Nunzio-puppy will be a year old 🙂
– a cute little grand-niece turns two
– her dad celebrates his birthday soon after
– two of our close friends each notch up another year
– a niece, a nephew and an honorary grandchild likewise
– and Ma-in-law turns 80

Birthdays are usually fun, particularly for kids. They enjoy the anticipation, the excitement, the tasty treats, and, of course, the presents. Although I have no specific memories of my childhood birthdays, I do remember an overall sense of wellbeing. I guess I simply took it for granted that the day would be special. Mum always made a yummy cake, there were gifts from my parents and (sometimes) my siblings – and the pile generally included a much anticipated book. Occasionally I’d be given lunch money to enjoy some tuckshop marvel instead of the peanut butter and syrup sandwiches that Dad usually made (!). Happy times.

It wasn’t until I moved out of home that it occurred to me just how much time and effort Mum must have put into ensuring that each of us felt special on that one day of the year. Not an easy task with six kids and a full time job to wrangle, I imagine. I wonder who made her birthdays special when we were little…?

Thinking about this, particularly with Ma-in-law about to turn 80, I’m conscious that we tend to rely on our on close family and friends to fill the niche of organiser/facilitator of birthday-happies and to add sparkle to our day. But like many mums, Ma-in-law’s not one to like a fuss – even on her birthday. She would like to feel special and perhaps even have a small gathering, so plans are afoot and troops are being rallied to ensure that her day is memorable (in a good way). She’s asked for a Napoleon Cake, which is something her mum used to make when she was a kid. I’ve managed to hunt down a recipe that sounds like it’s what she’s after: sponge cake, surrounded by raspberry jam and mock-cream, encased in baked puff pastry and then topped with very pink icing.

Luckily birthday cake experiments are nothing new around here. DaughterDearest and  Boychilde have generally chosen their cake each year – until quite recently. Some cake requests have been trickier than others and the challenge has been to come up with a plausible version of what they selected. We’ve had all sorts, including adventure cakes, ponies, clowns, fish, kites, farmyards, lions, an Inca temple and a giant apple. So a Napoleon Cake doesn’t sound like too much of a challenge. Even so, a trial run is probably a good idea – perhaps even this weekend.

Whether or not there’s someone to step up and make the day as sparkly as we’d like, everyone deserves to have a good day. So  this is a list of pro-tips I’ve collected from people who, for a variety of reasons, often end up taking their own birthday-planning on board:
– everyone gets older (if they’re lucky!) – so make it work for you
– decide to have fun, whether it’s with others or on your own
– prioritise yourself all day
– take the day off work (!!)
– plan a gift – something you’d really like – and then buy it for yourself
– go to a movie / the beach / have a massage – basically do something you enjoy
– avoid entertaining on the day… unless your guests offer to cater AND to clear up afterwards!
– don’t feel guilty about anything!

Even though my family does make me feel special, this has become my standard birthday to-do list. It’s actually jolly good fun – and, yes, I do all the things!